In the beginning, planning a family is one of the most exciting things to happen to a relationship. First, there is the new excitement of adding to your family; then, however, if you do not conceive in the first 3 to 6 months (or 12), that excitement starts to decrease, and it may take the romance right out of the equation.
This is something we hear about from our own patients and unfortunately, most of our patients come to us after 12 or more months of TTC and not getting pregnant, which means intercourse may already be lacking intimacy. The hope of fertility treatment success may spark the relationship and get it back on track.
3 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Afloat Despite Fertility Treatments
Try not to let fertility treatments affect your love life. Focusing on your relationship maybe a good way to prioritize it and once you become pregnant your future child(ren) would want parents who have a strong foundation based on partnership and romance.
Here are 3 tips to help you keep the romance in your relationship strong during fertility treatment.
1. Practice self-care and seek the support you need.
Self-care during fertility treatments is important. First, you need to take care and nourish your body, mind, and spirit. Try to maintain healthy lifestyle choices that support fertility, and it is essential to optimizing your mental and emotional well-being. It is difficult to not have anything left to give or share with a partner.
Eating well, getting a good night’s sleep, making relaxation and stress management a priority will set you up for a great start when going through fertility treatments.
Secondly, self-care, during fertility treatments, is ensuring you receive the support you need outside of your partner. You both need other outlets (friends, family, support groups, fertility counsellors, etc.) to hone the skills required to cope with the emotions of infertility.
2. Redefine romance
Romance is more than intercourse or passion. Love is a combination of care, commitment, knowledge, responsibility, respect, and trust. Love a verb rather than a noun and couples could chose love over other things like fear, anger, resentment, or guilt.
True romance is about, but not limited to:
• Trust
• Communication
• Connection
• Vulnerability
• Feeling inspired
• Humour and fun
If your partnership embodies these qualities, then the romance part of your relationship will resurface. Schedule dates, events, and together time that focus on these core elements of connections and let the rest go.
3. Go on dates
If you feel like romance is not happening, take a few deep breaths and reset the narrative. The more you over think it, the harder romance is. Instead, be honest that intercourse may not be the only way to connect romantically, instead, connect in ways that strengthen the relationship holistically.
Whether you are a local or visiting Toronto, ON specifically for fertility treatments, there are many fun things to do and see. If you are looking for something entirely outside of the traditional date box, consider planning a date to:
• An Immersive Experience
• Escape Room
• Bike riding
• See an attraction!
• Go to an area you have never been
**Trying something new together is a great way to feel more bonded than ever.
A lot of patience, communication, and effort go a long way and Tripod Fertility is here to give you the infertility support you need. If you need any support on a professional level, we are available for guidance and advice. Schedule an appointment today.